BBC - Films - High Noon - 5th February 2004

		Nicole By A Nose Tongues have been wagging about a big-screen version of Bewitched for many a year, and now it's time for noses to start a-twitching. Yep, Bewitched has finally been given the green light. An adaptation of the much-loved (by us anyway) 60s sitcom about a domesticated witch, her interfering mother (is there any other kind?), and her hapless husband (is there...?), the big-budget new version will star Nicole Kidman and Will Ferrell, with Nora Ephron (aaaaaargh!!!!) to direct her own script. Bewitched will start shooting this summer, with producer Douglas Wick waxing lyrical about Nicole Kidman's, er, nose. "Once you imagine Nicole's talent and that perfect nose, it's hard to think of anyone else in the role," he tells Variety, presumably with a straight face. "We knew the world wanted the pairing of Nicole and Will Ferrell [just above 'world peace', apparently]. He's the perfect embodiment of humanity, she's the perfect embodiment of otherworldly." Wick glossed over Nora Ephron's involvement, so we'll just leave you with two thoughts: Michael, and Lucky Numbers.

		King Crowned By Empire The Lord Of The Rings: The Return Of The King walked away with the Best Film prize at this year's Sony Ericsson Empire Awards. Although Peter Jackson lost out to Quentin Tarantino for best director, the concluding part of his JRR Tolkien trilogy did claim two other awards: best scene (for the Ride of the Rohirrim) and best British actor (Andy Serkis for his remarkable vocal freakery as Gollum). Love Actually picked up three gongs: best actress (the tearful Emma Thompson), best newcomer (Martine McCutcheon), and best British film. The main acting awards went to Keith Richa... er, Johnny Depp for Pirates Of The Caribbean, and Uma Thurman for Kill Bill: Vol.1. Career backslaps were given to Sigourney Weaver (career achievement), Roger Corman (independent spirit), and Ray Harryhausen (inspiration award). For more information about the event, check out Empire Online.

		Two Faced Rockwell Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind star Sam Rockwell will play Zaphod Beeblebrox in the upcoming big-screen adaptation of The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy. For the uninitiated (ie anyone under the age of 30), Beeblebrox is the two-headed president of the galaxy who gives mild-mannered Englishman Arthur Dent (Martin Freeman) a ride when Earth is demolished to make way for an intergalactic highway. The rest of the cast includes Mos Def as Ford Prefect, Bill Nighy as alien planet designer Slartibartfast, and Zooey Deschanel as Beblebrox's girlfriend, Trillion. The sci-fi/comedy starts shooting in London this April, with Garth Jennings in the director's chair.

		Indiana Bones Anyone eagerly awaiting Indiana Jones 4 shouldn't hold their breath. It was hoped that the fourth instalment in the archaeological franchise would soon go into production for a 2005 release. Well, that ain't gonna happen. The problem is the script, and ironically it's George 'I wrote The Phantom Menace' Lucas who's bitching about it. Shawshank Redemption writer/director Frank Darabont had penned the current draft (following on from M Night Shyamalan's previous labours), but now that his script has only found favour with Steven Spielberg and Harrison Ford, it's back to square one. A new script is in the process of being commissioned from a new writer, with the film now looking at a 2006 release. As Harrison Ford will then be 64, at least he won't have to search far to find an old relic.

		Bring Me Sunshine 28 Days Later duo Danny Boyle and Alex Garland are to team up again for Sunshine. The sci-fi thriller has been described as The Wages Of Fear in space. For anyone who hasn't seen Henri-Georges Clouzot's 1953 classic, shame on you! ...Fear is about a group of truck drivers transporting explosives across country, and is the original white knuckle ride (Movie Cliché No.34). According to Variety, Sunshine follows a "similarly fraught mission in space". Sunshine is expected to cost around $40-$45million, with shooting set to start at the end of the year. No word yet on casting, but we can already see Orlando Bloom chowing down on Yorkie bars.

		Affleck's A Brat - Official! Young, free and single actor Ben Affleck is to star in (bad title alert!) Brat Farrah, based on a novel by Josephine Tey (us neither). The book has been filmed once before, as 1963 Brit pic (bad title alert!) Paranoic (us neither), which starred Oliver Reed and Maurice Denham. Fight Club scriptwriter Jim Uhls is on board to pen the new version, which will be about a family fighting to get their mitts on the old man's inheritance. Benny Boy can next be seen on lots of supermarket magazine covers and in Kevin Smith's Jersy Girl, out here on 25th June.

		Jesus H... Oi vey! Has Mel Gibson bowed to pressure from the Jewish, er, pressure group The Anti-Defamation League? Reports are circulating in the States that Gibbo's deleted a scene from The Passion Of The Christ. Shock horror! The scene sees Pontius Pilate addressing an angry Jewish crowd calling for Jesus' crucifixion and the crowd cries out: "He's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty boy." Sorry, wrong film. Apparently the crowd cries out: "His blood be on us and on our children". Some Jewish leaders claimed the line would fuel anti-Semitism, although given that the film will probably only be seen by one vicar and his dog collar, we're sceptical about those claims. The Passion Of The Christ is released in the UK on Friday 26th March. The question is: will it still be hanging around by Easter?

		Duff Goes Back To Roots Tween idol Hilary Duff will star in Outward Blonde, a painfully titled movie about a bratty young New Yorker who gets sent on an Outward Bound program after failing gym class... Brit actor Paddy Considine is about to get hit by two things: Russell Crowe, and The Big Time. The In America actor will 'go Hollywood' with Ron Howard's boxing yarn Cinderella Man, playing Crowe's best pal (presumably Paul Bettany was busy)... Kate Bosworth will play a "small but pivotal" (spot her agent's words!) role in Bee Season. The drama revolves around a spelling bee competition, and also stars Richard Gere, Juliette Binoche, and Max 'son of Anthony' Minghella...